At Cresel Learning, we believe that the cornerstone of exceptional customer service and collaborative workplace dynamics lies in one powerful skill: perspective-taking. How often do we find ourselves stuck in conflicts, misunderstandings, or service breakdowns because we’re viewing a situation through a single lens? To address this, we introduce “Walking in Another’s Shoes”—a transformative session rooted in the Perceptual Positions technique developed by NLP pioneers John Grinder and Judith DeLozier. This method equips professionals with the tools to reframe challenges, deepen empathy, and foster lasting improvements in relationships and service outcomes.

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Why Perspective Matters in Professional Relationships

In today’s fast-paced, interconnected world, success hinges on our ability to navigate complex human interactions. Whether resolving customer complaints, bridging communication gaps with colleagues, or leading teams, rigid thinking often exacerbates problems. The Perceptual Positions technique disrupts this cycle by inviting us to explore three distinct viewpoints:

1. First Position: Your own perspective – What do you feel, need, or believe?
2. Second Position: The other person’s perspective – What might they be experiencing?
3. Third Position: The observer’s perspective – What patterns or opportunities exist beyond the immediate conflict?

By cycling through these positions, participants unlock actionable insights while learning that the only person they can change is themselves—a principle that drives sustainable growth.

The Four-Step Process: A Roadmap to Clarity and Connection

1. First Position: Grounding in Self-Awareness

Begin by anchoring yourself in your own experience. Ask:

• What emotions or values are driving my actions?
• What outcome do I desire from this interaction?

This step fosters self-awareness, ensuring participants acknowledge their needs without judgment.

2. Second Position: Stepping into Empathy

Physically move to a new space (e.g., a different chair) to symbolize stepping into the other person’s reality. Here, participants:

• Imagine seeing, hearing, and feeling the situation as the other person.
• Ask: “What must be true for them to act this way?”

This builds empathy and uncovers hidden motivations, reducing blame and defensiveness.

3. Third Position: The Observer’s Insight

Shift to a detached, analytical stance. From this “fly-on-the-wall” perspective, participants:

• Identify recurring patterns (e.g., communication breakdowns).
• Recognize broader lessons (e.g., “If I’m not listening here, where else might this apply?”).

The observer position reveals systemic dynamics, turning isolated incidents into opportunities for growth.

4. Return to First Position: Integration and Commitment

Revisit your initial perspective with newfound clarity. Reflect:

• “How has my understanding evolved?”
• “What am I willing to change in my behavior to improve this relationship?”

This final step bridges reflection to action, empowering participants to own their role in the system.

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The Power of “Breaking State”

Between each position, participants break state—a deliberate pause where they shake off the previous mindset (e.g., standing up, changing seats, or discussing an unrelated topic). This practice:

• Resets mental and emotional focus.
• Encourages cognitive flexibility by engaging different parts of the brain.
• Prevents old patterns from clouding new insights.

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Why This Technique Works: Beyond Quick Fixes

Many conflict-resolution strategies focus on changing others or finding surface-level compromises. The Perceptual Positions technique, however, targets the root cause: our own perceptions. By committing to self-reflection rather than control, professionals gain:

• Deeper Empathy: Seeing through others’ eyes dissolves resentment and fosters collaboration.
• Sustainable Solutions: Shifting your behavior creates ripple effects, often inspiring reciprocal change.
• Adaptability: Lessons learned (e.g., active listening) become tools for future challenges.

Real-World Applications

• Customer Service: Resolve complaints by understanding unmet needs behind frustration.
• Team Dynamics: Bridge misunderstandings by uncovering unspoken pressures on colleagues.
• Leadership: Model accountability by asking, “How might my actions contribute to this dynamic?”

Conclusion: Your Journey to Richer Relationships Starts Here

The “Walking in Another’s Shoes” session isn’t just a training exercise—it’s a mindset shift. As Grinder and DeLozier envisioned, it teaches us that the key to influence lies not in changing others, but in expanding our own perspectives.

At Cresel Learning, we challenge you to ask:

• What relationships could improve if I saw them through a new lens?
• What systemic patterns might I be perpetuating—and how can I disrupt them?

By embracing the Perceptual Positions technique, you’ll transform service breakdowns into breakthroughs and friction into connection.

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Cresel Learning – Empowering professionals to see differently, act intentionally, and lead impactfully

Discover our “Walking in Another’s Shoes” workshops and other programs designed to elevate your team’s emotional intelligence and service excellence. Contact us to learn more.